Why I didn’t attend my graduation.

…I kinda sorta fell asleep, and here’s why “Degrees” are bullshit. Alright, who’s next — alright Nabeel Tahir, may you please approach the stage. “He’s not here.” “Where is he?” “He’s asleep, I think.” “He’s not here for his graduation?!” I wasn’t actually asleep, I was sitting around our share-house with my buddies thinking of how this was the end; it was time to grow up — get out in the real world. I didn’t want to have to pay $80 for a loaned graduation-gown and a hat, another $60 for a “Professional Photograph”, and a few seconds of stage-time…...